Control Issues

Okay, I admit it; I have control issues. My unbending belief in God's sovereignty, my trust in His gracious providence and my hope in His already accomplished acceptance of me too often come up against my innate desire to control my circumstances.

Too often I take the words of Genesis 1:26 and 28 (to "subdue" and "have dominion over" the earth) too literally. I like observable, tangible progress. I like seeing things happen. I want to control my circumstances and those associated outcomes while avoiding the more negative version of outcomes: consequences. And I want it all to happen according to my own self-imposed timeline/s.

I wonder how often God laughs at me (?) I think I already know.

Working to start a new church in a new city is akin to trying to walk in a straight line with the lights off. Plans do not always go according to plan. It is not always easy to gather people into community. It is a challenge to see how each event, even what appears to be insignificant events fit together into the big picture when the big picture is not yet all lit up.

God knows I cannot handle the big picture. I'd screw it up. I'd try to amend it or speed it up. My control issues would grow exponentially. I would be a small-time tyrant, and the consequences of which would be chaos and anarchy and some seriously misguided motivations. And my unbending belief in God's sovereignty would suffer under scrutiny.

Church-planters know this, but they don't know it until they know it: church-planting is a faith walk. And maybe I can number myself among other church-planters who have learned to pray, "...Your kingdom come, Your will be done..." in a way they wouldn't if they were not church-planters.

And it may be I need to see God's will  also applies directly and today to my self-imposed timeline/s.

Man School

Church-planting is a strange gig, but for no lack of information. The planter (me) has access to all sorts of ideas how to go about getting a new church started. Some of those ideas come from church-planting friends (ideas that work, at least somewhere else.) Some other ideas come from me (ideas of how not to do things, based on past experience.) And there are lots of ideas available from books and websites and blogs and conferences and countless other sources, usually written by successful practitioners who have earned the right to headline conferences and write books, websites, blogs and those other sources.

Church planters suffer no lack of available information. But different priorities and different methodologies lead to different kinds of churches. And the sad reality is, not every concept, not every method, not every idea is transferable; or should be.

To "exegete" the culture means to identify the histories of people who make up the city, to observe the rhythms of the city, to note the idols of the city, and to humbly "prescribe" the KIND of church the city needs, even if the city doesn't necessarily agree it needs a new church, or any church.

Every church-planter (at least the ones I know) really wants their church to be centered on Jesus. They want their people to know the gospel, and they want their people to live out the gospel. Every church-planter wants to see their people living in community with other believers, on mission. And every church-planter knows he needs to raise up other leaders who will in turn multiply other leaders.

Here in Juneau we (today) began the process of raising up and equipping church leaders. It may be these guys will never be a part of the new church plant (that exists still only in my mind), but they will be equipped to lead a church somewhere here in town.

We met this morning at 7:00 AM in a restaurant with an owner kind enough to open it up to us hours before they open for real. He believes in what we're doing. We're using two different resources (see paragraph #1.) We're beginning our journey together studying the Book of Acts, the record of how and why new churches get started in new places. We've assembled a group of men who love Jesus and have exegeted our city enough to know our city (and its churches) needs more gospel leaders who will raise up and equip other leaders in the gospel. We call it "Man School."

Is this church-planting? I don't know. Depends on the definition I suppose.

Substitute

For weeks (months) I watched my wife get up and go to work each day, while I asked God to fill my calendar and make me busy. He answered my prayers.

I've been a substitute teacher in our local public school district for three weeks now. I have substituted as an English teacher, a Drama teacher, and a Psychology teacher. I've been a para-educator for special education students, a reading specialist for Montessori students, and a PE teacher (where I made football players play "duck, duck, goose.") I even served a day as "office boy" for the nice ladies in the main office at one of our high schools.

It's a good gig, at least for me. I can pick and choose the days I work and the assignments I accept. I can also choose to be the sub desk lady's hero by taking jobs she is desperate to fill that day, even if I later regret doing so. I am learning to be flexible and patient. I am reminded that kids appreciate humor. And I am refining my skill to fake what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.

And I am again aware of the pervasive brokenness in our world, how the entire Creation has been violated by sin and death (to quote a theologian I read this morning.) I've seen this specifically evidenced within the walls of our schools.

I've encountered kids who do not eat lunch, and not by choice. I've interacted with some students who do not bother to dream dreams or envision a positive future. I've shared a conversation with a student who is writing an essay entitled "Go to Hell, Dad." In this the student is bitterly rejecting his father who rejected him years ago.

I've come across educators who love what they do, care about the kids and gladly enter into their students' pain, on and even off the clock. And I am humbled that some of those teachers have added my name to their preferred sub lists.

So for now, part of my daytime church-planting endeavor is to be in the schools. The goal is to be an intentional peacemaker, even as a substitute, in a small way reflecting The Peacemaker. And in doing so I find myself praying, "Maranatha; Come Lord Jesus, Come!"